I like the definition of well being that I heard someone once say. It comes from the times when we had wells. A person was said to have well-being if their well was full. In this way, they were of use to family and their community.
So, how full is your personal well?
If your well is empty, then you are giving emptiness to your loved ones, work and everyone around you. If your well is full, then you are giving your family the best of you.
In this way, acts of self-love and care is not a selfish thing. It is ways in which we fill ourselves, heal ourselves so that we can be of service to our loved ones, so that we can give freely without fear of running out or being drained.