Tools for keeping our mental well-being during isolation
There are three aspects to maintaining mental wellbeing at this time. These are not distinctive phases, but some previous behaviours need to achieved before we can build on the next and other suggestions are useful in all three stages.
1. Stop the fear mentality
2. Re-set - going into the cave
3. Re-build - coming out of the cave
Stop the fear mentality
Fear affects all aspects of our being – mentally, physically, psychologically and socially.
The first thing with fear is to find loving ways of getting out of Fear Mentality. Recognise that it is normal and natural to feel fearful at this time. That is okay. But to stay in fear is dangerous to us and our loved ones.
Think of fear as a fire. For its survival it needs constant fuel. So to stop it, you don’t need to fight it, just limit its food source, and then it becomes controllable. How to stop feeding the fear.
Water the flowers not the weeds. Whatever you water/give energy to, will grow. Change your focus – Instead of focusing on the virus/fear, focus on the positives around you.
Stop reading all the post, articles, websites about the virus. I know we feel that with the ever-evolving situation we need to constantly know what is happening. Why? What can you do about it? Nothing. Those in government need to be on constant alert. Yes, we still need to know what is happening so we can respond. In this case, listen to the news once a day so you know what’s going on.
On social media, focus on the non-virus posts – about the lovely sunset, or lost kittens. When talking to people via social media, in person or on the phone, deliberately talk about anything BUT the virus. This helps to change the mind from worry or fear to what else is going on. In other words, it opens our eyes to our lives.
Look for lightening moments in your day. A lightening moment is any moment in the day that you enjoyed, or relaxed. It can be as small as noticing a bird, your first sip of coffee, a smile from a loved one. Look for at least three per day.
In the evening, talk about them to others, with your family. Animate the lightening moments, talk about them, share them with friends on social media. This changes the energy in your home.
The current situation is a great teacher for how to live the serenity prayer. Not in a religious way. But as a healthy way of life. You don’t even have to use the word God.
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (the virus is here and it is restricting and affecting my life)
The courage to change the things I can (how I face this situation, my mind-set) and the Wisdom to know the difference (notice when you are worrying or obsessing about things that are out of your control – eg: getting angry that the borders should have been closed sooner, or what will happen in a month’s time)
Practice mindfulness and loving kindness practices. Mindfulness is simply being in your body at this moment.
- Gift yourself some time with yourself
- Stop being busy, stop doing things and just for a few minutes, be still
- Notice the sounds around you and relax
- Notice your breathing and relax even more
- Notice the nature of the mind that it keep running away from this moment. Or the fear/anxiety that you feel when you stop
- Just notice it with loving compassion for yourself
- Keep bringing your attention back to the sounds or breath. Letting go
- Now if you want, gently, send a wish to you from you. A wish that I am peace at this moment. Focus on the one cell that responds to the wish, ignore the 99 cells that fight it
- Allow and gift yourself peace at this moment
- And then if you want, extent this feeling of peace, by wishing all your loved ones peace, in whatever way they want it
- And then if you want, expand this further to all the people in your area, your town, your country and then the world. Just a gentle friendly wish for all to have peace
- Sit with how this feels in your heart and being.
As you go to sleep, wish yourself peace and fall asleep feeling peaceful. Throughout the day when you feel yourself getting worked up, gently connect with the wish to be peaceful anyway.
These simple practices take out fear and anxiety and bring us back into our hearts. They take us out of the reactive fear brain and bring the thinking brain back online.
Change your perception. Like the saying goes, whether you think you can or think you can’t, either way you are correct.
Likewise, if you think of isolation as hell, stressful, OMG I can’t do this – then that will be your reality.
If you think of isolation periods as an opportunity, that is what it will be.
Youthline:
https://www.youthline.co.nz/
Free call 0800 376 633
Free text 234
Depression:
https://depression.org.nz
FREE 24/7 HELPLINE:
0800 111 757 TEXT 4202
Healthline
0800 611 116
Mental Health Crisis Team (CATT Team)
Select your DHB for contact numbers or ring Healthline 0800 611 116.
Need to talk?
Free call or text 1737 any time for support from a trained counsellor
Lifeline
0800 543 354 (0800 LIFELINE) or free text 4357 (HELP)
Suicide Crisis Helpline
0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO)
Samaritans
0800 726 666